Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Laws on Courtship - guest blogger post by Fauxx

I once had a stack of romantic quotes.

I found it among my aunt's college-period possessions. A hundred or more cards each with a hit-or-miss cheesy quote in every one. I remember ravaging through them like a fat kid on M&Ms. Twice. You know, that time when younglings are all curious and ideal about these stuff and trying to figure out their rhythm in what we can say, their mating dance. And there I was, focused on the art of tugging young and tender heartstrings. 

She gave it to me, thinking maybe, I'd need it someday. Thinking about it now, I am supposed to give those cards away to someone special (at the time) or whatnot. But I didn't. I wanted to keep all of them instead. It made me feel older and braver. Less fearing of things I do not know about. And I, am in love with Love.

Girls would swoon over them. I did not care that much.

And I loved the words and prose in those cards. Some even snuck up to one of my many love letters after. And all of them end up getting hoodwinked by a friend of mine. I have no idea where they are now, except I meet them in text messages, in status updates, in movies. I never had the chance to use those cards.

One did stay with me. Metaphysically.

"I don't believe in courtship. It's just a waste of time. If I love a person, I'll tell her right away. But for you, I will make an exception… just love me now and I'll court you forever…"

My one rule in courtship is not to actually do it.

Now, when I say courtship, I really mean trying to woo the girl's affections. That is the waste of time part. Making efforts to make the girl like you when she's predisposed to not actually liking you. Of course, this entailed problems when you actually like a certain girl but she doesn't know who you are. I learned how to make those unrequited love-bouts abrupt. But that's another story.

What I've learned about not-courting, when I kind of actually am, is that I love it.

I love the chase, so to speak. I like how you become a love song magnet for every other song that plays on the radio which seemingly sings about your fortune and predicament. I love how Leigh Nash's Need To Be Next To You sounds better each time. I love how I jump up from each love letter, each secret glance, each nervous walk in proximity and each text message. The preparation you make, the perfumes you wear and the faltering voice you have when trying to speak to her. Hell, I even love the heartbreak that sometimes comes with the package.

As Incubus said so, Love hurts and sometimes it's a good hurt. And sings when it transcends the bad things.

Okay, so back to courtship. I didn't know back then that some women (like some men) are actually cunning, scheming, egotistical, self-absorbed, insensitive, narcissistic assholes. They use you and your feelings as tools for their own purposes and vagenda (new word from Fringe, look it up). I thought that these people are the scums of the earth, love-wise. But the worst kind are those who are too proud to admit, or ignorant to know, that they are.

And that, is yet another story.

Keep those politically incorrect words to heart. It's not being jaded, it's being wise. That's heads-up number 1: beware of these soul-sucking assholes. Heads-up number 2: love yourself. So when shit starts hitting the fan, friends wouldn't catch your corpse in a ditch or a random billboard in EDSA trying to kill yourself. (and failing, which would be a total hassle too) Worse, you go all-out emo and bitch on Facebook for months.

All things said, I still think courtship is worth it. Go for it. Savor the moment. Seize the day. Heart in hand. Head over heels. Swan dive. All or nothing. (And this does not only pertain to men in general. Women court men too.) Like for the sake of liking. Love for the sake of loving. (Just know your limits)

Photo taken with permission from Maprang.

Kiss dating goodbye and kiss another hello.

Photo taken with permission from Maprang.

I say this, because I know how frustrating it is to not do it as often as you had the opportunity to. If courting to some is a series of mistakes, I wished I had a few good seasons. Even bad ones. Love for the sake of loving. Until you still can. Until you fall out of love with Love. Because someday, you will learn how to not want to court someone else.

I know how to live in that inopportune moment when you come across the person you know you are going to spend your life with, and a hundred cards about love and courtship goes to waste. In fact, no number of cheesy love cards can prepare you when you actually meet him or her. 

It is so frustrating.

Anyway, that's all. Just a heads up.


NOTE: The author is trying to sneak in the word "whatnot" to everything he writes. 

I have decided to have guest bloggers every now and then; I don't have a definite plan or schedule with guest bloggers so expect their posts every once in a while or more often than mine. =P 

My first guest blogger is a confidant & critique, he goes by the name Fauxx in the blogging world. He knows I WUBBB HIM so and I support him - like a mom supports his little boy!  He's my perverted protege! =P

I have always been a fan of his writing style but don't tell him, ok? Shhhh.... =P

Let me know what you think. I know my blog really doesn't contain any input about real life so here you go, from a guy's perspective.  Would you like to see more blog posts? I won't be just focusing on makeup and fashion, ok?

What's your take on relationships? Faux will be monitoring your questions.

By the way I was tagged by Michelle and I did a video. :/ I know the audio is bad... It's my fault. I only recorded it using the webcam because I was too lazy to set up the camera. :p

Anyway, it's better if you don't watch it ROTFL!!! =)) I'm tagging all the Pinoy followers of my blog.

NOTE: I randomly grabbed some pictures from the net. The other photos belong to me and some people I know. 

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